The Difference Between Men & Women

Overall, men and women age differently--period. Women see retirement and old age as a time of freedom and coming into their own after a life of service to others. Men seem to see it as a time to stop doing and start sleeping. This is a generalization, of course, but I see strong evidence of it everywhere-- dances, at book clubs, at church functions, at stores, in classes, etc.--women outnumber the men at every turn. Women also seem to stay healthier longer, as is evidenced by mortality rates. Women complain the guys don't want to do anything but watch tv. Men say they are tired of socializing and having to socially "perform" and become homebodies. Women want to travel, take classes, prettify the nest, be with family and friends. Men seem to prefer everything stay status quo. Neither view is wrong or bad--they are simply incompatible.

Of course the exceptions to this rule are the single men who need or want to find a significant other, the true extroverts, and the few married ones for whom activity and curiosity are a lifelong pursuit (however, these kind usually stay working rather than retire!). As one who isn't yet ready to sit on the porch in a rocking chair and watch the world go by, I have to say I struggle mightily with being around the more passive gender. Like the old story goes, when I die, I want to slide into heaven, spinning and used up and out of breath and be able to say "Wow, what a ride!" Don't saddle me with someone who doesn't feel the same!

Lovin' Every Minute and Reinventing Myself

I have to say I could get really used to having all this time off! I am staying busier than ever and doing things I LIKE rather than things I MUST--dancing, playing guitar, working in the house and yard, traveling. The world feels like it is expanding on a daily basis--so many interesting things to do or try or practice! My latest foray was trying Laughter Yoga with a group of friendly, fun-loving people at a local church. What a positive way to start a day!

Right now my focus has shifted to exploring new career possibilities. I am a month into a life coaching certification. Love the class, the concept, and the information! I get excited about using my counseling skills for a totally positive purpose. Have already done some mini sessions with my class peer group and with my current roommates with good success.

This weekend I start a permaculture design class that meets one weekend a month for seven months. It's all about sustainability and multi-use and becoming more self reliant in a way that works WITH the environment instead of sucking the life FROM it.  I am becoming more and more interested in sustainability and hope to try some straw bale gardening in addition to my regular garden this summer. I also want to volunteer at some of the local farms and take advantage of the farmer's markets in the area more.

Lastly, I have embarked on getting serious about my photography. Took a portrait photography class a couple of weeks ago and did a photo shoot with my sister and her dog earlier this week. Today I am doing engagement pictures for a friend of my daughter. Next week I have my daughter-in-law scheduled to be my guinea pig. I also have two other photography classes coming up and am meeting with a photographer friend next week to see about shadowing or apprenticing with him over the next few months. It is exciting and scary all at the same time. Possibilities!!!!

How to Lose Weight in Retirement

Well, an earlier post was about how easy it is to GAIN weight with all the extra time on your hands. However, I have found the "magic bullet" that allows you to not only LOSE weight but not really care about eating, either. It's called getting braces.

When your mouth feels like it's been sliced and blistered from the inside, when your teeth hurt whenever you bite down on something, when it feels like aliens have taken over your mouth and left their spaceship behind, it is easy to not want to put anything but baby food past your lips!

After 55 years of crooked teeth (well, make that 49 since they didn't become crooked until my adult teeth came in), I decided that now was the time to have a smile that I'd love to see. I have the money, I have the time off work to get adjusted to them, and after talking with my parents, I understood that the slight shifting that I've been seeing will only get worse as I age. I now have the utmost respect for my middle school students who endure this ritual on a widespread basis. I can't imagine having the body and looks issues going on at the same time! Wait a minute--I DO have the body and looks issues going on too.... Hmmm... do you think they would give me a refund if I decided to bail at this point????

Strange Bedfellows

It's not only politicians who find themselves with interesting alliances! I guess as you get older, the point is to have PEOPLE in your life as much as possible. Kids grow up, friends move away, people die. Living an isolated or solitary life is probably the absolute worst thing a person can do for their mental and emotional health.  This often necessitates living situations that are unexpected...

In the past month, I have lived with five different people: my husband, my parents, my daughter, and my ex-husband. In the coming weeks I will be living with my brother and my sister-in-law. Quite an interesting array! Yet, it is wonderful. Each person has brought something good to my life. I am at an age where I can enjoy them all. In fact, I wonder if living in a communal type situation isn't the best solution for all concerned. You have help with household chores and yard stuff, you have someone to share your day with, you have someone to watch a movie with, you have someone to share a meal with. We are social animals! It is not good to be alone... Maybe the politicians have it right (for once!).